___In Cover Of The Moon... <3
That's me in the corner ...

That’s me in the corner...
 
I woke up with this line today. What a pretty self-describing image. Like the singer was pointing out a picture to someone, “these are my friends, celebrating. That’s our happy couple no. 1, nearly married, although without the vows yet. This there is our other happy couple, newly got together. They weren’t an item when this picture was taken. These two are my other best friends. And that’s me in the corner …”
 
I never was the one to stand in spotlight, that’s for sure. I’m happy with the second row, usually. But there are times when I can’t help thinking: Why is it always the others? Why do I always have to stay in the corner? Why am I always the last to be asked, the last to be told, the last to be … gifted?
My friend Marie voiced it herself the other day: “Now it’s only you we have to get a boyfriend for. And Beccy, but she doesn’t seem to bother much anyway.”
Yeah that’s right. The current situation leaves only me out. When I first came here I was the first one to get one. But it didn’t prove right, he wasn’t the one I was looking for.
I don’t know if it will work out between them all, but the mere situation nowadays is enough to give me a downer.
 
Highlights on days like today cheer me up, fill me with hope, but there’s always this bit of downer in there. Like he only stayed as long as she did and was out the next minute she was gone. And today, how he asked me something and compared me to his sister in the same breath. His sister, oh please give me a break! Is is that how he sees me, like a sister?
That’s the most rotten bit of meanness I’ve come across so far.
All the times I’ve worked on become separated from that “little sister”  badge, all to be wasted?
 
Life’s just SO unfair…!
 
8.12.08 22:23
 


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